listening to my favourite song,
which reminds me of you...
waiting for your phone calls..
to ensure that you have reached safely..
i woke up extremely late,
without thinking about exam and anything,
but my head is extremely heavy..
it was aching...
looking at my watch..
it was nearly eleven morning..
thinking that you may reach soon...
waiting for your phone calls...
i have been holding my handphone by my side...
wherever i go..
worrying that i will miss a call...
but...
it did not ring at all...
i have been waiting for almost two hours...
i could not do anything at the moment...
just looking at the photo at your gave me...
remind me of good memories...
hoping that you will reach safely...
perhaps,
you have gathered with your family members...
the excitement that you had...
to meet your adorable sons and family members....
you may forget to inform me about your arrival..
i shall forgive you..
i understand this feelings...
tiredness with excitement...
it is common for u to forget...
and inform about your arrival..
the only thing i could do,
praying that u could arrive safely...
gathering with your family members...
the happiness will reveal on your face...
to gather with your family members...
where you have been looking forward in the past few months..
it would be more than enough for me...
i shall put my handphone aside....
and feel your excitement in my heart...
once upon a time, a girl sent her brother back to his country. She tried to hold on her emotion...she just left him by waving to each other.
she has everything a girl wish to own. her soul is lonely. she lived in circumstances that she has no chance to control and decide for her life. She is born and tied down with lots of control from people around her. She was unhappy in her life. She knew that she had no choice but to live with it. She always wish that someone would listen to her and at least to care for her. She knew this may not even happen as people nowadays just busy about their own lives. There is no such word like caring in the society.
A lonely soul is meant to understand another lonely and yet complicated soul in the same situation. Perhaps the difference is just the condition that they live in. She could identify and understand what this boy is lacking of or trying to hide of. It is not that she is powerful. She could sense what this boy is thinking and why he is behaving like that. It is because they are the same. She could know whether the boy is happy or not and each of his steps.
This girl has lots of restriction in life. She does not know who she is. She is in a state of confusion. Her life has been created in a way that everything would be arranged and she is always forced to follow others' opinion. She could not even have and imagine how her dream wedding would be like. The only thing she knew is to follow. It seems like a must if follow others' view. When she close her eyes, everything is a blank. She has lost herself. She does not know what she wants for her future. The only thing she enjoys the most is studying and working. It is because she has the only power to hold her works tightly and create the best out of it. No one will force her to do things. Other than day, she is always a follower. She rather to escape and not to care and bother. SUBMISSIVE..this is the word. THis girl has been depressed for a long time. She has lost in the middle of her life. She did not know anything about this life. She cannot speak up at all for what she wants. What a silent girl................
Today, she send her brother who always made her feel happy and being herself is leaving. She is just holding her emotion....not showing anything and pretend to have nothing.
31 December 2012,
it was new year eve,
staying at the library,
studying hard as usual..
my brother...
always like to describe the food that he cooks...
using all the words and adjective,
to convince me that he is a good cook..
i will always listen his narration about the food,
thinking that he may be good in descriptive words..
never takes his words seriously...
until...
this new year eve,
i was surprised.....
he gave me the food -- Kabsa
i took the food from him...
looking on the container...
the food looks good..well presented...
when i opened the container,
the smell...
touched my heart...
i was surprised...
the smell..
is fantastic..awesome...
i really attached to it...
i really like it so much.......
when i was eating the food alone in front of the library,
memories come to my mind..
thinking about my brother...
food that he introduced me..
all types of food in his country...
this really touched my heart....
i ate slowly..
enjoyed the food...
this food is so memorable for me..
this food means so much for me....
first time ever in my mind..................
THANK YOU, MY BROTHER...
never takes his words seriously...
until...
this new year eve,
i was surprised.....
he gave me the food -- Kabsa
i took the food from him...
looking on the container...
the food looks good..well presented...
when i opened the container,
the smell...
touched my heart...
i was surprised...
the smell..
is fantastic..awesome...
i really attached to it...
i really like it so much.......
when i was eating the food alone in front of the library,
memories come to my mind..
thinking about my brother...
food that he introduced me..
all types of food in his country...
this really touched my heart....
i ate slowly..
enjoyed the food...
this food is so memorable for me..
this food means so much for me....
first time ever in my mind..................
THANK YOU, MY BROTHER...
these special moments,
will always remain in my heart..
between brother and sister,
who have a strong connection,
caring and understanding each other...
i wish we could spend more times together...
before my brother return to his country..
to study with him.
to have every meal with him..
enjoy every single moments together...
my brother,
will ensure that i always have food to eat...
he will never allow me to be hungry......
he will even try to get some food outside..
just for me..i m really touched of that action of him..
my brother,
supports me when i am down,
inspires me when i am lost,
gives me lots of strength,
all the times...
i wish,
i could support him,
inspire him in return...
to be his best sister...
thank you so much,
my dear brother...
you will always remain in your sister's heart..forever....
I will never expect that this moment will come true in my life...
I have been through a tough times in this month...
sacrificing all my times doing my works just to complete this task...
there is a moment,
where i felt like giving up in this project,
where it tested my patience and determination,
At the end, i manage to complete this task,
it is a real challenge for me to deal with stress,
and handle difficulties in dealing in hardship.
Today,
I am glad,
as I got this certificate from the Dean of USM School of Education.
It was a pleasant reward after all the hard work in one month.
Never forget,
To thank my friend Susan Tiang , Uma Krishnan Dk and my close friend who supported and inspired me along the way...Thank you so much..
i could not imagine..
my assignment has all completed in one semester....
it's all coming to an end...
it's really fast...
i have been in usm for one semester..
it's too fast...
finally..
i have completed my assignment..everything is finished......
in this one semester,
i have been through many things in usm..
from friendship to hardship..
i learnt about every single little things..
about human behavior and
how to deal with them...
it's a fruitful lesson indeed...
how can one measure patience?
Brother Freddi used to tell me,
to be a teacher,
you need to cultivate patient...
that is the word...
now,
the test has come,
real test,
that reminds you.
that you have to be patient,
in dealing with your boss....