~rhythm of life~

if

being emotional,

Wow, I got alarm clock early in the morning...
You woke me up...
Listening to you talking to me in the morning is like having discussion with you...
I struggled hard to listen to you,
To ensure that I am NOT dreaming...
Because I still can't remember and believe that I return your miscall that day....

Haha...
Now I need to continue my questions..
I hope that I can get it done by today..
Somehow I felt today is a good beginning..
Hopefully it will be..
As your voice woke me up,
Inspire me to complete my task.

Thank you so much,
for everything that you have done so far..
I will remember it forever.........

When you are happy,
everything goes well.

When you are sad,
everything does not go well at all..

I truly agree with this...

My postgraduate life is getting tougher and challenging.
AM I being too ambitious?
Trying to be multi-tasked people..
Now,
I am suffering in my heart..
I am unhappy..
QUESTIONS..i just hate it...
It has taken most of my times...
I lost all my times to study because of it!!
I was accidentally involve in it..
and now I have to bear the consequences..

Life is not easy,
when you wish somebody to be around,
this person will not be there..
i know i am being greedy at times..
I can't control anything that happens..
Just let it be then...

Sigh....

Last night, I was so happy on skype chatting..
I slept smiling...
Today the mood twisted 180 degree...
I slept anxiously...
I just hate this kind of feeling....

This is the problem when you are emotionally engaged,

REMEMBER what your KO KO had taught you about BUDDHA's teaching,
EVERYTHING IN THIS WORLD IS IMPERMANENCE..
You got to understand this rule...

Now i can't control myself..
tonight i won't be meeting you..either tomorrow..
I understand you are doing everything good for everyone beside you..
satisfying everyone around you and make them happy..
this is you...

I wish you will be there for me..
Feeling empty now..


LIFE IS FULL EMPTINESS...

BUT

I CAN DO IT,
I CAN MANAGE IT,
I CAN HANDLE IT!

NOBODY CAN STOP ME!!

LEFT 20 QUESTIONS!
JUST DO IT!!

          It is a special day for me 16/11/2012... I never expected that i could laugh this much. it was truly a crazy moment for us. It was really an awesome day for us since i stayed in Penang.  I tasted the best food with the best service from the waitress. We played so many games in the restaurant. We had lots of fun together. This restaurant gives us the best memory in our lives..........

Dear friend,

I encounter song lyrics that truly describe about you.
I could see that you found love is a flower and you are the seed. Because of love, you are willing to grow up as a mature person. You have helped many people in along the way. Because of love, you have learned a lot from your surrounding and it made you a better person who have a good personality.  

But, your heart is afraid of breaking. You never learn to let go and listen to your inner feeling. You never find yourself truly happy as you try to show people that you are feeling good. You should take a chance to let go all the problem around you slowly. 


Remember this, my friend,
It's the one who won't be taken,
Who cannot seem to give
And the soul afraid of dying
That never learns to live.
I  know, you are not like that,
You can give unconditionally,
But you need to learn to live meaningfully for yourself too....

I believe that, 
When the night has been too lonely and the road has been too long.
And you think that love is only for the lucky and the strong.
The reason you are studying now it's all because of your kids,
I believe that you will be stronger because of them.

       It's about two months I am living as a postgraduate student in USM. I started to find myself being busy with so many tasks like assignments, presentation and project. It's truly amazing that I started to have a true friend who truly care and support me along the way. Life as a postgraduate is not easy at all when you encountered with all sorts of people who have different attitudes and behaviors.
        It was such a difficult time for me in last 2 weeks when I found out the true colour of my group members. It even hurt me a lot at that time because I suffered a lot completing all my tasks alone spending more than 6 hours in front of my computer. I was shocked because I encountered such person in master course who was so selfish and pretentious. I was really helpless at that time. Luckily, this person appeared at the right time when I was in trouble. I found him to be a problematic person when I saw him with his odd behavior and he was the one who was helping me when I was in big trouble. It sounds weird but it is an undeniable fact. He came and helped me in the library without any complains. He gave me lots of mental supports when I was not confident with myself at all. In my life, I did not expect that I can stand in front of everybody and present my thought without holding a paper which full of sentences and script. I was truly surprised when I was able to make it, which is speaking out my mind. I never thought that I can be so confident now. That's all because of my friend. Beside that, I enjoy talking to him, sharing teaching experience, culture and tradition from different country. In fact, we found out that actually human beings are the same, facing the same issues like greed, selfish, despite differences in religions, skin colours and beliefs. 

             Today, I am very happy.  I can see that my friend is cheerful now. He began to accept where he is and doing what he is supposed to do. I am pleased to see that he is willing to share with me all the issues that he has encountered with his friends and course mates  He is no longer a person who buries all his feeling. I can see that he is a cheerful person now. In fact, he is changing to be a better person. This is truly a good news for me. We complaint to each other about the problems that we face in the courses that we take. We laugh on the weird people in our course and their funny behavior like smoking and cursing. It was really funny when we keep on commenting people that we know, imitating them all the times. In fact, we used certain words to represent some funny issues like pregnant lady phrase. People might not know what we are talking about, but we know what we are referring to. This was really funny.

        I am really grateful to have such a good friend. I do not expect that I will have such a good friend in uni. I thought my postgraduate life would be like a working people and I will spend more time at home. But, I feel like I am a student now. I have friend to hang out with like what I did in undergraduate last time. I am really lucky. This friend of mine will always remind me about my work and check on me. My friend will always care for me and even lend his helping hand to me when I seriously need help. 

      Therefore, I appreciate every moment with my friend. I knew that it would be only a short time we spent with together. I wish that we would have the best memories ever together in our postgraduate journey. THANK YOU, friend for spending your times with us! Without you, I would not know how to manage the critical situation in my group. Thanks for guiding me.  Thank you for gifts and times! I appreciate it!